THE LORD OF THE (Toe)RINGS

 

Chapter Five: A Conspiracy Unmasked

 

Podima: dun DUN... dun DUN... dun DUN dun DUN dun DUN...

 

Teegs: For the last time, this isn't Jaws! *smack*

 

Frodo and the GJT, together again, made their way across the Brandywine and to DG's cave, cleverly and conveniently hidden near Buckland. DG opened the door.

 

Frodo: Your cave has a DOOR?

 

DG: Yes. So?

 

She led them in aways.

 

DG: You guys all need a bath. TAKE ONE! NOW! *points to a bathroom*

 

Hika: I'll join you, Frodo!

 

Frodo: No! Um... I have serious problems about bathing with other people... um...

 

Frodo quickly ran into the bathroom and locked the door.

 

Hika: Damn.

 

After they all showered and bathed,

 

Teegs: Hika, why was the floor all wet?

 

Hika: *innocently* There was a hurricane!

 

DG sat them down for a lovely dinner of... what else? Pixy sticks!

 

Frodo: Er... I'm not hungry, thanks. *stomach growls*

 

Teegs: EAT IT!

 

Hika: Or we will EAT YOU.

 

DG: BUM BUM BUM BUM!

 

Podima: *from random place* HEY! I'M THE SOUNDTRACK!

 

DG: But you're not here right now.

 

Podima: Oh, right. I'm not. *moos out*

 

Hika: So! Frodo! We know everything.

 

Frodo: *blink blink* Of course you do! You listened in on our conversation.

 

DG: Exactly. But we already knew before that.

 

Frodo: EAVESDROPPERS!

 

Teegs: I haven't been droppin' no eaves!

 

Frodo: >.< So this was all a plot for you to get to come with me?

 

GJT: Yes.

 

DG: Hmm... we're alone... in a cave... with Frodo...

 

Frodo: Ummmm... I'm going to bed!

 

Hika: Can I come with you?

 

Frodo: NO!

 

Hika: Damn.

 

DG: That's okay, I have the key!

 

Frodo: ALONE! AND IF ANYONE COMES IN, I SWEAR I'LL... um... DISFIGURE MYSELF!

 

GJT: NOOOOOOOOOOO! *sniff* We'll be good.

 

DG: Alright, Dead Bob will show you to your room. We'll leave first thing tomorrow morning!

 

Teegs: Where are we going first?

 

Frodo: I was thinking of taking the shortcut through the Old Forest.

 

Hika: BUM BUM BUM BUM!

 

Podima: *randomly pops in* STOP IT! *pops out*

 

GJT: MWUHAHAHAHAHA!

 

DG: Sounds great to me. I've been in there tons of times. Go me!

 

Teegs and Hika: Go you!

 

Frodo: *sigh* Alright. First thing tomorrow morning. Please try to kill me.

 

Hika: Aww, we wouldn't do THAT...

 

Frodo: *sigh* Damn.

 

END OF CHAPTER FIVE.